PSL (closed)

[1stknight]

[Honestly, being summoned was quite the surprise to Bedivere. Being a saber, he knew he was at a disadvantage. After all, there were so many more sabers even just from the Round Table who were much more famous, so surely they would have been summoned over him. In fact, he was sure it had happened countless times before. That one master he had met, the one from Chaldea, they had spoken of singularities and grail wars to span several worlds and timelines. And with so many fine Sabers to choose from, he was sure that he hadn't ever been summoned before. The short time between the 'creation of his legend' and 'now' notwithstanding.

It made him feel a touch inadequate, if he was being truthful. After all, he was a simple knight. The master who had summoned him, he deserved better than someone like him. But if he was the one who was summoned, then he would fulfill his duty to this new master. Nothing would be done in half-steps, never again.

So as his form solidified in the summoning circle, Bedivere offered his new master a warm smile. Once again, his life was sworn to someone else's. Whatever his master wished for, Bedivere would help him achieve it.]

Saber, Bedivere. I am honored to be summoned by you. From now on, I shall be your Servant.

['I am honored to be summoned at all' was the truth, but he didn't speak that.

Then he paused, and he took a survey of the situation. The summoning circle was expertly made, but this man in front of him...well. He didn't look like a mage. He looked like a normal person. Perhaps it was a disguise? Or maybe there was more to this situation than he could see immediately. He would have to wait for his new master to respond in order to find out more.]

Comments

[neverwashere]

[Huh. Not the reaction he expected.

Dazai waved his hand across Bedivere's eyes, wondering where - oh. Of course. Because specifying a dragon's humanoid form probably wasn't enough.]

Have their wicked way with them in a very sexual manner. Voluntary, for both parties. No cannibalism involved whatsoever.

[Right, man-eating dragons were a European thing. He cleared his throat.]

The point is, some people like playing out such scenarios in bed. Doesn't have to be a dragon-and-human thing. You can go with something like, oh, criminal and nobility. Kinbaku practitioner and volunteer. Police interrogator and suspect. Etcetera, etcetera.

[1stknight]

I-I got what you meant the first time!

[Boy, did his voice just pitch upwards in tone. Sunned silence was quickly changing into mortification.]

Why would anyone want to- no, nevermind, I don't want to know.

[He rubbed at his face with his hand. Maybe if he rubbed at it enough, the heat on his cheeks would go away.]

[neverwashere]

[There we go. Not so innocent after all if Bedivere got it the first time.]

Oh, but you will. [Dazai gleefully cupped Bedivere's cheeks and squished them. Look, more hands to keep the heat in!] It's a sign of trust. Most people don't surrender and make themselves vulnerable for just anyone.

[1stknight]

Ah-

[You know the unfortunate part about being contracted to Dazai? If Dazai was touching him, he couldn't escape into spirit form to avoid conversations. That meant that all he could do was grow redder in the face as he tried to stammer through his sentence.]

D-dazai, you don't need to explain it-

[He did try to step backwards, though. Which meant he was about to trip over and fall backwards across the futons. The question was if Dazai would fall with him, or if he could let go and stay balanced.]

[neverwashere]

Eh!?

[He was already almost leaning on Bedivere before the slip happened, and they were too close for him to avoid the tangle of their feet.

Suffice to say, he was still winded when Bedivere cushioned his fall, and he couldn't help but star up at the man's face. Ending up half-sprawled on Bedivere's lap was... well.

He'd take it?]

[1stknight]

[Ah.

This was awkward.

With Dazai on top of him, Bedivere couldn't really move anywhere. All he could do was wait for Dazai to pick himself up. But despite how awkward the closeness was, the break in conversation from tripping did help interrupt Bedivere's embarrassment. Small victories, or something like that.

After a couple moments, Bedivere coughed awkwardly.]

We should go to bed, Dazai.

[And sleep and pretend that Bedivere definitely wasn't imagining his king handcuffed and begging to be touched.]

[neverwashere]

Right.

[Dazai cleared his throat and rolled off. A second later, it occurred to him that he'd been in close proximity to a nice patch of Bedivere's skin thanks to that loose shirt, and maybe he could smile away the flush on his cheeks.]

Of course.

[After turning off the lights, Dazai got under the covers of his own futon before holding his hand out for Bedivere to take. Actual sleep was going to take a while, and the saddest thing about this situation was that he couldn't even check his phone for how long he's pretended to be asleep.

Actually - would he be able to tell if Bedivere was sleeping? Dazai strained his ear to listen to the other's breathing pattern.]

[1stknight]

[Bedivere didn't sleep, strictly. Servants didn't need sleep, so he would never fall into anything identifiable as the deeper cycles of sleep. But eventually his breathing did even out, and Bedivere was in a state not unlike what a light sleeper might enter. It would have to be close enough, until Bedivere gained a human body again.

It was enough to dream, though. And those dreams held memories of the past.

A memory of a conversation long ago, between a knight and his king, about why the king had taken such a plain man as a knight. It was a conversation that showed just how much said king valued Bedivere, and how Bedivere's kind heart was such a valuable part of the Round Table. Embarrassing words to hear, but it was something Bedivere had needed. And beneath that respect and admiration for the king, something else started to grow too. Something Bedivere wouldn't be able to identify for a long, long time, but something that was there nonetheless.

It was something that became a bit more heated than it had ever been in life, as Bedivere remembered the weight of Dazai's body on top of his. But instead of Dazai's brown eyes peering down at him, twinkling with mischief as Bedivere found his hands to be restrained, it was a set of familiar blue eyes.

The dream wouldn't go further than that, as Dazai's would interrupt that particular chain of thought. But it was a dream that would linger on Bedivere's mind for several days after.]

[neverwashere]

[This was how Dazai fell asleep: looking up at the darkness of the ceiling as he listened to Bedivere's even breath, not quite sure what to feel with actually having to fall asleep with another person in the room.

Thing was that he could've gone on to tease Bedivere - did he know that some Japanese couples laid two futons next to each other like they were doing now?

Of course, the longer he stared up the ceiling, the more his thoughts slipped back to the events of the day and the memories certain conversations evoked. The following morning, Dazai would regret not going for that night cap if could've helped him fall asleep earlier. Maybe then he wouldn't have such a mood whiplash of a dream. Because those nice sunlit memories full of pure love, devotion, and maybe a little bit of naughtiness? They would soon devolve into the grim greys of Yokohama's criminal underworld, full of rain, grimy concrete, and dried blood.

Here was Dazai, six years younger and joyless, looking at a sedated Q being carted off to a van owned by the Mori Corporation. A few feet from him were a couple of guys in hazmat suits, cleaning up the evidence of a freak accident.

After checking how long they had before Q woke up - a couple of hours, said an older guy in the suit, deferential in spite of their age difference - Dazai nodded and gestured for him to move on ahead before fishing out his phone.

Doing this with one hand sucked. Stupid crutch. Stupid leg-breaking Chuuya.

Stupid boss that he now had to call before he had to escort Q back to the base. Because this new kid they picked up? His ability wasn't trainable with the timeframe Mori wanted.

Dazai woke up feeling rather shitty, a bleak mood for the bleak shadows of his room. Mori had come to the same conclusion that Dazai had kept to himself.

To efficiently cut through the Gordian knot that was a sane and responsible person's time table, all they had to do was to train Q to get other people to injure him. The shock of physical pain would spark that malleable child's emotions, which in turn would activate that child's hallucinogenic Ability.

Sometime after the incident, Dazai had wondered if inducing euphoria would also serve as another trigger. He never bothered finding out.]

[1stknight]

[Ah. There was that darkness, and that connection to the Master they had to face.

Bedivere didn't talk first thing that morning. He certainly felt energetic- a night of taking mana from Dazai had provided him with more than enough energy for the day- but he wasn't sure how to even broach the subject of that memory he had seen. Especially since they hadn't talked about the shared memories before, and Bedivere wasn't sure if Dazai understood what was going on.

Once again, Bedivere's reluctance to speak out meant he was keeping quiet about something important, and it would likely blow up in his face later.

Instead, while Dazai went about his morning routine of waking up and dressing himself, Bedivere worked on re-attaching his metal arm and fixing his shirt. A button-up shirt was a pain to put back on at night, maybe he could search for a pullover one today instead. Though he didn't want to outright ask Dazai, because he was only to stay for a few weeks at most. He felt bad asking for anything special, under those conditions.

Once he was put back together and dressed, Bedivere once again made breakfast for Dazai. It still wasn't the breakfast Bedivere would have liked- meat was so expensive in Japan- it would have to do.

It was only once Dazai came out to the kitchen that Bedivere finally spoke to him.]

Good morning, Master. Are you ready for breakfast?

[A cordial greeting, one that danced around the real issues of the morning.]

[neverwashere]

[One vivid dream about Bedivere hadn't seemed strange, even if Dazai had no clue why King Arthur looked androgynous in his dream, if not feminine, sporting a hairstyle similar to Bedivere's. But for it to happen twice in a row? And for him to picture a romance between the two, no less!

Not that he had any clue on how to bring that up, coffee-deprived as he was so early in the morning.]

Mmn. [He'd toss Bedivere a new shirt for the day - no need to recycle the same set as yesterday. If he was a little more reserved than yesterday, he could blame it on the hour. Dazai still hadn't connected that his dream about Q yesterday was something Bedivere was now aware of] For lunch, there should be something on the way to the forest.

[He slumped down on the dining table with a yawn. Later, he might think to loan Bedivere a yukata or samue.]

[1stknight]

[New clothes! Bedivere would thank Dazai for that, and changing wouldn't take too long. He didn't shower yet, though. Bedivere was used to spending weeks on the road without a bath, and would probably avoid the shower until he got particularly dirty or bloody. Or someone else forced him to clean up.

Dazai's tiredness did concern him, though. A plate of food was deposited in front of Dazai, and then Bedivere took a seat at the table as well.]

Didn't sleep well?

[neverwashere]

Nothing that coffee can't fix.

[See, this was why he usually didn't step outside his dorm until he was properly awake. He had an image to uphold, and a personal reputation to mock.

Food, however, was a welcome break from the usual, and he clapped his hands together - how long has it been since he had an actual cooked breakfast in his own dorm?]

Itadakimasu!

[Time to check if the flavor matched the tasty smell.]

[1stknight]

[It was serviceable enough. Bedivere wasn't a master chef, but he made food that was edible. Which probably meant it was tastier than the food Dazai was used to.

Once again, Bedivere sat there and watched as Dazai ate his meal.]

Coffee and a good meal, no? Ah, but I think I saw your neighbor sniffing around earlier. Should I make some for him too some time?

[neverwashere]

[Hey, canned crab was still tasty!

Still, a tasty well-cooked meal did wonders. Dazai felt halfway normal after the first cup of sugar-loaded coffee, and he cracked an eye open to look at Bedivere from the rim of his cup.]

Atsushi-kun, you mean? [Dazai hasn't invited anyone else into his room since moving in. Actually, he hadn't considered it until Bedivere's suggestion.] Sure, but I'll have to come up with an excuse as to why I have someone else over.

His senses are sharp. I've no doubt he's heard you by now, or at least suspect something's different. I don't wake up early if I can help it, you know.

[1stknight]

I gathered as much, given how long it takes you to be fully awake.

[He's not poking fun at Dazai, he's stating a truth.]

You work with him, yes? Would it be worth letting him in on what is happening here? Or is it better to keep this a secret from him?

[An ally with sharp senses could be useful, but Bedivere would defer to Dazai. Dazai knew Atsushi best, after all. He would be the one to know if Atsushi could keep a secret.]

[neverwashere]

[That was the question, wasn't it?

Here was the thing: Atsushi wasn't the type to take survivor's guilt well. As if anyone had an easy time with survivor's guilt, but Dazai would rather that no one troubled themselves in such a way on his account. In fact, it was one of the criteria he had for a beautiful death, and why he hadn't explicitly mentioned the death match aspect of the grail war to Kunikida and Fukuzawa.

So yeah. He calmly ate his breakfast as he figured out how to answer Bedivere.]

I won't stop him from following us if that's what he wants, but neither will I give him all the details. As unexpected as my participation in this conflict is, I'd rather not let him get caught up in this in case things go south.

Something like this can't be the end for him.

[1stknight]

[Ah. So Dazai had a soft spot for Atsushi.

Bedivere could understand not wanting to get anyone else caught up in the Grail War, given the high likelihood of death. Atsushi did seem young too. Was it Dazai's desire to protect him that led Dazai to not want him to get involved?]

It's alright, I understand. We won't get him involved.

[neverwashere]

[Dazai nodded. Exhaled.

Part of him was grateful that no one had yet asked him what his wish was. Atsushi knew where Odasaku's grave was, had guessed correctly that he was Dazai's friend - but speaking about the man still was too personal of an affair.

Really. Dazai thought that Atsushi shouldn't get caught up in a a foolish man's bid to dream.]

What was your king like?

[1stknight]

My king?

[The sudden change in topic was an effective distraction from Bedivere's thoughts on how relived Dazai had sounded in that moment there.

How could he even start to describe his king? It would take forever to paint even an adequate picture of him. But perhaps being succinct was alright too. It wasn't like Artoria was there to get offended or anything.]

He was very quiet and reserved. Actions spoke louder than words, he lived by that. He was a very good king, and England lived in a time of prosperity under him. But I think he was burdened by the responsibility of it all. I can only hope that those of us at the Round Table were able to ease that burden.

[neverwashere]

[Dazai nodded. He wasn't that familiar with Arthurian legends and the political context of Arthur's court, but it was a shame that a mythical golden age crumbled because of jealousy, betrayal, and a whole host of other things. And for Bedivere to speak of a king's burden, a hint that he'd seen the person under the crown...

Well.

Equally significant was Bedivere's omission of King Arthur's final days, though Dazai figured it had to do with Bedivere's own regrets.]

Ideals can be difficult to translate into reality, and there are some who don't know how to live without conflict. [Dazai gathered rice to the bottom of his bowl and scooped up a mouthful with his chopsticks. Mulling over his dreams about Bedivere's loyalty was easier to focus on compared to his memories of the Port Mafia.] It's admirable he even tried.

What the King and the Round Table accomplished even for such a short period was hard to pull off. I believe it's one of the main reasons his legend still lives on to this day, at a time when replicating such a feat has its own complications.

[1stknight]

[Bedivere nodded in agreement. His loyalty made him biased, but it was still good to hear someone else recognize the efforts his king went to for the sake of his country. Even if things had ended in tragedy, his intentions had always been good.

Good intentions...Bedivere was suddenly reminded of a time, in another world, with another king. One where good intentions had turned to authoritarianism, and then to mass executions...

Bedivere's stomach was in knots, and he swallowed down those memories.]

Why do you ask? Curious to see if the legends live up to the king?

[neverwashere]

You can say that.

[Dazai propped his chin on the heel of his hand, giving Bedivere a thoughtful look.]

You glow, you know, when you talk about the King. [Aaaand moving on before he could dwell on the nature of loyalty -] I'm sure this won't come as a surprise, but people still kill each other to find their slice of utopia. Yokohama isn't any different.

In a world where gentlemen's agreements are upheld only half the time and the chivalric code doesn't exist, what would King Arthur do to get different factions to work together? Especially if one party considers serial homicide as an acceptable measure to control the spread of power.

[Because that was one way to look at Dostoevsky's plan of action. Dazai didn't get how eliminating ideas would purge the world of sin or some bullshit like that - ugliness was part of man. Abilities merely made it easier to express that fracture of their nature.]

[1stknight]

Do I?

[Bedivere's eyes widened in a momentary surprise. Was he really so enamored with Artoria that he glowed even from the memory of him? How embarrassing.

But then Dazai continued with another thought, and the embarrassment was brought down to a more realistic thought. What would the king do in this situation? How would he unite everyone?

There was only one answer, and Bedivere said it carefully.]

He wouldn't. Getting seven factions at once to work together would be impossible even for him. He would pick one or two allies that have goals aligned with his and make an alliance out of them.

[neverwashere]

[Dazai didn't say 'yes,' but his expression was enough of an answer.

As was his sigh when he heard what King Arthur's possible plan was.]

Of course.

[Well, at least he tried looking for an answer.]

What would he do with the others? Ease them out politically? Give them a distant corner of the kingdom to manage so they don't pester him? [The second one sounded iffy as he said it - granting the opposition a power base could fuel an uprising... well, maybe that was part of why Camelot crumbled. Resentment was hard to deal with when it added fuel to the fire.] Have someone else deal with them?