[Canned crab addiction. For obvious reasons, real crab will fix the problem, but anyone supplying him might have to kiss their wallet goodbye.

And. Bedi.]

Including me teasing you? It'll be a shame, but I suppose I did promise to protect your dignity, and it's really not a proper discussion for... [A beat. Right.] Young ears.

[So sayeth Dazai reluctantly, pretending that he also doesn't want a certain someone with two moles and a pair of glasses bringing up this development.]

If you want to remain discreet, are you sure giving them the excuse of, oh, prolonged hand-holding won't work? Plus plenty of food and sleep.

[Flimsy alibi, but might be worth a shot?]